Making Friends in Hostels: A Complete Guide
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Looking to make friends in your hostel? This can be one of the best (and scariest) ways to make some travel buddies.
But, how do you actually make friends in hostels? How do you approach strangers in unknown territory? How do you speak to someone you’ve never met before and not make a complete idiot out of yourself?
Yep, I can just feel that social anxiety kicking in 😬. If you’re travelling solo, you may have days when you want to be alone. But for the other parts of your trip, you might find you’d rather be exploring with someone.
In the following post, I’ve rounded up the best things to do (and not do) to make friends in hostels.
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Making Friends in Hostels
1. Be approachable
Be approachable. This means being open to new ideas. Open to people who may be different to you, with different beliefs and backgrounds. Don’t sit on your phone all of the time. Smile at your roommates. Say hello!
Be approachable. Have open body language. Make people want to talk to you!
2. Make an effort
Just the simple things go a long way. Make an effort to get to know someone. Ask questions. Talk about where they’ve already travelled to, and where they’re going next. Be interested! (And don’t just pretend to be interested).
If your social anxiety is bubbling, start small. Start with a hello, then a simple question about what their plans are that day (or have been if you’ve arrived in the evening). If they’re not too friendly – which is rare – don’t take it personally. Not everyone you’ll meet on the road will click with you, and that’s ok!
3. Book onto hostel day trips
Most backpacker hostels will host day trips for solo travellers on a regular basis. This means it’s set up for you to make new friends. Organised fun is a great way of making new friends in hostels. And not only do you get to meet some new people, but you get the experience of a fun day out!
So if that social anxiety we mentioned is there, organised fun is a great way to just be thrown in the deep end with other backpackers. They’re also great for travellers who find it hard to ‘make the first move’ when it comes to talking to new people.
4. Work for the hostel
If you’re staying in the hostel for a long period of time, you can also ask to trade your work for your bed. Not only is this a great way to save money for your travels, but it’s an amazing way to make friends in hostels.
When doing this, use Worldpackers. They’re a trusted site with volunteering opportunities all over the world. You can choose the job you do, how long for and how many hours you work per day. Check out Worldpackers opportunities here! (Plus my link gets you $10 off your membership!)
5. Don’t be reliant on anyone
At the end of the day, everyone you meet in a hostel has their own priorities. You cannot become reliant on anyone you meet in a hostel. Remember, you chose your own destination, with your own ideas, and so did they.
Give yourself options. Don’t let the friends you make in hostels deter you from why you visited that location in the first place.
6. Join online travel groups
If you meet a few other people outside of the hostel, it can give you a boost of confidence for when you’re back in the hostel. Make friends in different kinds of ways whilst you’re travelling. Send someone a message, and see if they’re free to meet up for a coffee.
7. Allow for spontenaity
If you’re planning on making friends in hostels, you’re going to need to be spontaneous. Some plans may differ from yours, and you might need to change your schedule. Allow for spontenaity. Be open to new ideas. Join in with your new travel friends.
8. Keep to hostel etiquette
If you don’t follow hostel etiquette, the chances of you making any friends are going to be close to zero. Hostel etiquette doesn’t include big things, just a few minor points you need to remember when you’re staying in a shared dorm.
Things like:
- Keeping your belongings in one area.
- Not hanging your towel up on someone else’s bed.
- Not sitting on someone’s bed without asking them first.
- Not turning the light on in the middle of the night.
- Turning your alarm off after a maximum of three rings.
- Avoiding eating smelly foods in a dorm room.
- Taking phone calls outside of the dorm room.
- If you enter the room at 2am, keep it quiet!
9. Remember you were a newbie once
You may get to a point where you’ve made some friends in your hostel. You’re feeling pretty great, and don’t think you need to add anyone else to your ‘clique’. Just remember, you were a newbie once! Be welcoming to all, even if you’ve already found hostel friends.
10. Hang out in the common room
Start hanging out in the common room to meet other new people in your hostel. Try not to let your social anxiety go overboard and stop you from talking to people who may already have friends. If they’re kind, they’ll be happy to involve you in their chat. If you need a bit of an icebreaker, bring sharable food.
Food = friends 🤝
Bring a bag of sweets or crisps or even better, a pizza… offer to share your food and you’ve got a brand new conversation starter.
11. Be accepting. Even more accepting than when you are at home.
When you travel, you’re introduced to hundreds of people you wouldn’t normally meet back home. This means you’re going to meet all different kinds of people, from all walks of life.
Whether it’s personality traits, background, cultures, languages, or appearances, you name it, you’ll meet someone the total opposite of you in your hostel room at some point. If you spend your time being judgemental and thinking ‘I don’t normally click with people who do so and so‘, you’re going to have a pretty lonely trip.
I’ve become friends in hostels with the most unlikely of people. In hostels, there are no rules as to who you can and can’t be friends with. Be accepting, kind, and open.
12. But accept that you WON’T connect with everyone
Whilst you’re going to meet people from all over the world, the honest truth is you’re not going to love everyone. Accept this, and you’ll immediately take some of that pressure off to make friends with everyone you meet in your hostel.
Meaning you’ll have more energy to socialise with the people that you DO connect with! More energy = more new friends in hostels!
13. Don’t be too opinionated about your experiences
If you overhear someone in your dorm room planning to take a trip to a waterfall you didn’t like, don’t put a downer on their experience. Just because you didn’t like the waterfall, doesn’t mean you have to crush their idea of visiting with your negative energy.
Be positive, encouraging and let people enjoy things on their own terms. (Unless it’s really bad, then they might appreciate the heads-up!)
14. Be YOURSELF! 👏
To put it simply, the best way to make friends in hostels is to BE YOURSELF. You are YOU, with new perspectives, insights, experiences and uniqueness. Let that shine through. Be your amazing self and let those hostel friends roll through.
Hostel packing list
- A padlock: to keep your valuables secure when you leave your hostel room.
- A hanging wash bag: to make sure all your toiletries are kept in one place, and won’t get confused with anyone elses
- Speakers: because, well, who doesn’t love music? Just make sure everyone in your room gets a chance to pick a song! (And no one minds you playing the music)
- A microfibre towel: Not all hostels will provide you with towels for free. Bring your own to save extra ££.
- Earphones: for loud nights and disruptions to your sleep.
- Flip flops: if you’re using shared showers.
- Eyemask: for uninterrupted sleep.
- World travel adapter or an extension lead: so you’re not using more than one plug!
- Your laptop or tablet: for movie nights, of course! 🍿
Making Friends in Hostels: In a Nutshell
So, there we have it. A definitive guide to making friends in hostels and making your shared dorm experience just that little bit better.
At the end of the day, as long as you’re friendly, confident and YOURSELF, you’re pretty likely to make friends in hostels. On the road, most people are solo or in couples and WANT to meet new people. That’s what travel is all about!
So next time you’re in your hostel, or your first shared dorm room, go for it. Make those lovely new hostel friends. You got this!
Happy travelling!
Jennie 🙂 x
Other posts:
- Best Hostels in Puerto Escondido For Backpackers (Guide)
- BEST Hostels in Tulum for Backpackers! (Guide)
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MEET THE AUTHOR!
Hi! I'm Jennie! As a part-time travel blogger based in London, I'm using my 10+ years of travel expertise to encourage & inspire you to step out of your comfort zone through sustainable, mindful and purposeful travel.
If I'm not writing, I'm either reading, drinking coffee or taking a wild swim (all at the same time if I'm feeling impressive).
